20 Questions Tuesday: 7

Thanks for the questions everyone. This week’s interrogators are lsig, the anonymous poster who loves Wifey, Nadolny, and Bomber. I have even more questions from folk that will be answered next week in 20 Questions Tuesday: 9. To the Questions!

1. Aside from your own, what is, in your opinion, the best blog ever?
Currently the one that I am most enamored with is Geoffrey Chaucer Hath a Blog. A couple of caveats here. Caveat the First, I am not a Chaucer fan, I barely made it through 2 of his Canterbury Tales in high school. Caveat the Second, I find it insanely difficult to read Middle English. Keeping these 2 caveats in mind, I find that blog dreadfully amusing. The amount of effort that must go into the posts is staggering. I assume the author has to write out a post and then painstakingly translate it into Middle English, and the posts would be humorous even if the author just kept them in Faux Middle English. Considering the work that goes into the posts, coupled with the humor shown, Geoffrey Chaucer Hath a Blog is my current favorite blog. Next week… maybe something different. I am fickle like that, or “Ich am fyckel lykke that.”

2. Why do people still like Shakespeare?
Shakespeare pretty much codified most of the archetypal characters. While there were bunches of prolific playwrights prior and post Shakespeare, he did the most thorough job of fleshing out the primal characters that everyone bases their modern characters around. I am not saying that Shakespeare invented or even perfected the “Tragic Hero” or the “Scheming Villain” he just was very good at fleshing those characters out.

3. On a scale of 1-10, how cool are you?
I need more information, does 1 = “uncool” and 10 = “cool?” What is the population? the world? the US? my company? My Cubical? Hollywood? Def Jam Recording Artists? Origins Gaming Convention? What are we talking about here? Who’s definition of cool? Mine? A typical 13 year old sub-urban kid? There has to be more of information. I cannot work from the collective definition of coolness because it contradicts itself waaay to much. But by that logic, we would all get a 5.

4. If you had to do it over again, would you major in something different in college?
I am not sure. I might have gone for Architecture, but that is a really difficult program to work through, especially when one sees what the typical new hire and mid-level architect has to put up with. I am fairly happy with my major at the moment. I found out that undergrad degrees show employers that you can study, master’s level degrees show you can do research, and doctoral degrees show you don’t know when to let the sleeping dog lie.

5. What would constitute a "perfect day" for you right now?
One with a nap. I mean that in a very Zen way, I would like to be One with a Nap.

6. Where were you August 4, 1962?
I wasn’t.

7. What would be the benefits of crocheting a "monitor cozy" for your computer, much like the crocheted doll toilet paper roll cover you have in your bathroom?
Are you questioning Wifey’s bathroom décor? At your own peril ask this question…

8. How much French could a Frenchman French if a Frenchman could French French?
Umm, if one defines “French Kissing” as kissing with use of the tongue, then to “French” should be to tongue something, and when ordering salad dressing one’s choices are often Italian, House, Ranch, or French, for the purposes of this question, “French” shall be defined as the salad dressing. This makes the original question translate into: How much salad dressing could the Frenchman Lick if the Frenchman could lick salad dressing? Ummm, I need a time period. I will arbitrarily choose the time it would take a Frenchman to like a bucket of French Salad Dressing.

The answer is then: A bucketful.

9. If a picture paints a thousand words, than why can't I paint ewe?
Lack of talent.

10. If Britney Spears, Paris Hilton and Jerry Springer's audience all died at the same time, by how much would the world's mean IQ raise?
Actually not that much. There are a whole boat load of people in the world, and even if those people are the most outlying of statistical outliers, the mean would not change noticeably.

11. Is there a professional society for cartographers?
At least in North America there is, the North American Cartographic Information Society, or NACIS.

12. What pet/s do/does your family have?
We used to have 3 cats, Lenny, Señor Don Gato, and Charlie Baltimore. Alas with Little Man’s allergies we are without pets.

13. Why do the nets inside of mens’ swim trunks make your butt itch?
I believe you might be wearing them incorrectly, or are abnormally hairy in the nether regions.

14. I am a little infatuated with the idea that glass isn't truly a solid, nor a liquid. Over time, it appears that windows "melt". What do you think of the physics of this?
Glass is considered a metastable liquid. Over time it will indeed, start to slowly pour out of window panes. I think the physics of the solidity of the Twinkie vex me more.

15. I mentioned to a friend the other day about having seen sneakers thrown up on electrical wires and how that had always confused me. I mean, who the hell would think to do that? Anyway, he said that it was an indication of a house selling drugs. Is this an urban myth?
I have always been intrigued by the sneakers on the power lines. I have no idea why that would happen, and I have not heard the explanation of sneakers on a wire indicating a drug house. I would think that the police would smurf that one out after a while.

16. Your take on the following - southern hospitality vs. midwestern friendliness.
Many many times southern hospitality is merely politeness. There is not any underlying hospitality associated with it. Much of southern hospitality, in my opinion, is about appearance and not about substance. Now, midwestern friendliness is a bit more genuine, but, to be sure, there is a level of politeness for politeness’s sake going on for it as well.

17. What's your favorite comfort food?
Totino’s Crisp'n'Tasty Frozen Pizzas

18. Since you enjoyed the last one so much, what's your ideal vacation destination - probably two answers - one with just wifey, one with wifey and Little Man.
I love me some mountains. The Rockies would be a bunch of fun, but so would some nice trips to Europe. Ooooooh, Mountains in Europe…

19. Favorite 80's song?
There are soooo many that I could choose from. Ummm…. I am not sure if I could choose just one. There are Billy Idol songs that come to mind, The Cars, The Police, oh so many to choose from. If there were an 80’s song on endless repeat, what would I be able to stand? Hmmmm… I would have to say Murry Head’s One Night In Bangkok, Sugar Hill Gang’s Rapper’s Delight, Men at Work’s Who Could it Be Now, Midnight Oil’s Beds are Burning, anything off of U2’s Joshua Tree…. I really cannot choose just one song.

20. If you could attempt any profession other than your own, what would it be?
I think something in the marketing field.

To Recap:
Little Man is a bit under the weather today
Wifey and I are at Asthma DEFCON 2
The living room is all painted
Deciding between Sloppy Joes and Tacos for dinner tonight
I am not sure which one is the lesser of the 2 evils
Really I am kind of focused on the whole Asthma DEFCON 2 thing
Hopefully I will have something witty tomorrow
It would help if I slept well tonight
I am rather tired