20 Questions Tuesday: 10 - 1980's TV Edition

Today’s focus is on 1980’s TV. It is a topic near and dear to my heart. It is also a topic that is near and dear to my questioners hearts as well since I got over 40 questions to choose from. Next week will be 80’s TV the continuation. Thanks today to Wifey, Dustin, and B-Dawg.

1. Do you think that chimps as side kicks will ever come back in a big way on the small screen?
Sadly, I do not see many more uses of a great ape sidekick in modern TV. Alas BJ and the Bear, we knew you well.

2. On Diff’rent Strokes, why we didn’t know that Willis (Todd Bridges) and Kimberly (Dana Plato) were getting it on throughout the show?
Well, I did not put that 2 and 2 together to get 4 partly because by the time the show was cancelled in 1986 (for the second time) I was only 12. Not really where my mind was back then. Now, looking back on it with my adult-ish eyes… Let’s see, teens spending tons of time together getting high and drunk… oh, they were so doing it.

3. Since Alyssa Milano was your first crush, does that mean that you watched Who’s the Boss regularly?
Sadly, Yes. Tony Danza is not really what many would call a comedic genius. It was a bit painful to watch the comedic stylings of Judith Light and Tony Danza, just so I could (to use the modern vernacular) crush on Ms Milano.

4. Why did they get rid of Tootie’s roller skates on The Facts of Life? And why did they make her wear her head gear on the show? Certainly they could have taken it off when the camera rolled.
Ah! Tootie. She was my favorite. I think they might have made her wear the headgear to have someone on the set who was a typical kid at school. The rollerskate were probably confiscated by Mrs. Garret for being too distracting in class.

5. The appeal of Mr. T?
He was a bouncer who became a TV/Movie star because he embraced his campiness. Plus his animated form can swing an animated alligator over his head and still drive a United Colors of Beneton Gymnastics team around in a bus to solve crimes! ‘Nuff said.

6. Who would win in a fight between Mad Murdock (the A-Team) and Alf ?
Mad Murdock. Alf didn’t really have insanity going for him. He just ate cats. Little known fact, Alf’s name back on Melmac was Gordon Shumway. I always got that confused with Gordon Sumner, but that is, of course, Sting.

7. Could Fred Dryer's (Hunter) balding forehead have been anymore shiny?
Nope, but a better question is Could Stefanie Kramer’s hair have been more indescribably 80’s?

8. Whose bar tab was bigger on Cheers: Norm or Cliff?
Norm’s was larger. I remember seeing him actually finish a drink and call for another round. Cliff always nursed the same old beer.

9. Is it wrong to think that Richard Dean Anderson's hair-do in MacGyver (a mullet) made him look sexier than his short hair does now?
It is difficult to incorporate into one’s psyche that a mullet could be a better hair cut than any other that you have seen on someone, but it seems to be the case.

10. Umm… so were Smurfs asexual or what? I mean there were never any children Smurfs (or Smurflings) until their last season when they added the shark jumpers (Grandpa, Snappy, Slouchy, Nat, and Sassette).
Since the introduction of the Smurflings and Grandpa was to boost waining ratings, I will only speak to the bulk of the Smurf’s TV run. I for one always thought that the Smurfs were a commune of gay blue sprites. I mean, come on, Hefty, Handy, Grouchy, and Jokey were all doing it. The only one that wasn’t consistently getting any was Brainy, and heck, I bet he was getting some play from the no-names trying to get closer to Hefty. There wasn’t even a female Smurf until Gargamel made a brunette version of Smurfette to try to entice the Smurfs into his pantry. Later the Smurf magic made the frumpy brunette Smurfette into the perfect blonde Barbie-esque “hag” (if you will), that the show kept. So there are 3 distinct possibilities. 1. the Smurfs are entirely asexual and Smurfette is merely window dressing. 2. The Smurfs are a Homosexual sect of the species Blue Sprites (Caesius Lares Minimus) and Smurfette was their Hag. Or 3. Smurfette was a ho. I choose option 2.

11. Silver Spoons had Ricky Schroeder as its teen idol, but if Erin Gray had dressed like she did on Buck Rogers, could Silver Spoons have brought world peace or would it have pushed the world to the brink of destruction?
I just don’t know. I don’t know. Had Erin Gray dressed like her sexy Wilma Dearing self, men of fighting age would not want to fight incase they might anger their Spandex clad Para-Military Goddess Then again, there could have been an implosion due to the “Teen Idol Quantum Singularity Principle.” The 9 to 14 year old girls would have watched the show for the adorable Ricky (Please for the love of god call me “RICK”) Schroeder and the 9 to 89 year old males would watch and hope that Erin Gray “accidentally” dropped something and had to pick it up. That is such a delicate system, it really could go either way.

12. Would Sledge Hammer! defeat Tackleberry from the Police Academy in a shootout?
I think Sledgehammer would do more collateral damage (eventually leading to Tackleberry’s demise), but Tackleberry would wing him to death.

13. In the long range view of things, did The Cosby Show and The Jeffersons help or worsen race relations.
I think they may have hurt more than they helped. The Jeffersons, while dealing with touchy subjects, did tend to reinforce some pretty harsh racial stereotypes (not All in the Family harsh, but harsh enough), and The Cosby Show while trying to be a positive role model minority family caused many white folk to think that the minorities didn’t have it so bad. “Heck, black people are doctors and lawyers and live in spacious brownstones. Why do we even need welfare….”

14. Better instrumental theme song: A-team vs. Magnum PI
Miami Vice. Not really, Jan Hammer sucked. The A-Team’s theme song seems to dominate most other 80’s instrumental themes. For example, CHiP’s theme song can morph into the A-Team’s, but the A-Team’s cannot morph into Chip’s. The same is true with Battlestar Galactica (the original series). In truth, it was Magnum P.I. I sometimes have that theme song run through my head when I am late for work and driving like lives were on the line.

15. Better vocalized theme song: Fall Guy vs. Greatest American Hero
Greatest American Hero because I think the Fall Guy’s was actually sung by Lee Majors.

16. Why didn't the Diff'rent strokes gang ever take a trip out of NYC? They never went to Europe or even Boston or LA?
Mr. Drummond was never even seen in public with his “charges.” He wouldn’t sully himself by even being seen with Arnold and Willis in New York City. What makes you think he would deign to be seen in London, Paris, Boston or LA with them. He had money and decided to lift up 2 kids from the street, but he still kept them at arm’s length and never fully integrated them into his family. Sure ever episode would end with him telling Arnold how he should tell the truth, but Mr. Drummond never told the truth about his family. He said he loved them, but he didn’t. He only used them to feel like he was doing something nice. If anyone on this show should be considered evil, it is Mr. Drummond.

17. Do you think the Manimal ever ate someone?
I know if I were Manimal, I would have munched on somebody at some point and time. It would have been a perfect crime. No one would suspect that the guy with a British accent turned into a panther and ate someone. Not even Grissom on CSI could smurf that one out.

18. If you found an ALF, would you let it eat all of your food and cats without a problem? Leading to the further question: is it possible that ALF was actually vicious enough to eat the Manimal?
ALF was all talk. Never once on the show did he actually eat a cat, while Manimal, on the other hand mauled the hell out of bad guys every show.

19. If you were to be stranded on a desert island with either Jessica Fletcher or Miss Garrett, which one would you choose?
Miss Garrett. Angela Landsbury’s voice makes me want to claw my eyes out.

20. On the playground, which A-team member were you?
Howling Mad Murdock, of course. I WANT SOME TRASH BAGS!!!!

To Recap:
People pull out the stops for the 80’s TV
What?!? No questions about Automan?
I am still hungry
I think I will have to come up with 20 Question Tuesday’s Topics from now on
It seems to help
I still need to exercise.
Initially Little Man could not hear the difference between “poot” and “poop”
Therefore a “poop” in his eyes is merely farting
Whilst a “dirty poop” is… ummm… how shall we say… productive
3rd day of preschool, I’m sure all hell broke loose.
Not going to Boulder, CO for a wonderful trip with Wifey, that sucks.
I have a bad attitude today
Hobbitsies are tricksy!!!!