This morning on my walk from my parking lot as I was crossing my second 4 lane one way street, a car blew through the red-light and almost hit me. I had walked across 2 lanes when in the third lane he just blows through the light. I am going to belabor this just a bit more to be crystal clear. I, as the pedestrian waited for the crossing signal, and then walked across one lane of traffic, followed that up with walking a second lane of traffic, and as I was about to enter the third lane of traffic a car blew through the light. I walked 24 feet across the street and after that 24 feet is when a car blew through the light. That light that he went through was a funny shade of green my friends, a funny shade of green.
So today is a day of extremes. This morning was all about the adrenaline which is being followed by the post adrenaline crash. The idea I had for a topic today just did not make sense, so this is an Ask Me Anything day.
1. Why don't you have a topic?
I just could not think of anything that I had the energy or interest for today. It has been a while since I have done one of the random ones.
2. Do you have any upcoming interviews?
I am on question 17 with one person, and question 13 for another, and I am on question 8 with someone who is actually asking me 20 questions.
3. How long are you going to keep this up, anyway?
As long as I can. It is still kind of fun.
4. Do you think we all have time to keep coming up with stuff for you? Do you?
I do not think that all of you have the time, the energy, or the interest every week to send me questions, but I do believe that there is a critical mass weekly that are happy to.
5. What kind of friend are you?
The distant kind.
6. Were you thinking about your utter lack of topics when you were nearly run over today?
I honestly was not thinking about topics during the near miss.
7. I think you're topic should be "Pedestrian stories" - both times when cars acted dangerously toward pedestrians, and times when Pedestrians acted dangerously toward cars. As for Bikes, you can count them either way.
While this is not really a question, I will treat it as kind of a question. I could not think of a good angle for a topic using near pedestrian misses. I was concerned that the questions would end up being mainly asking me to comment on someone else’s near miss or just a streak of me describing my near misses. I just could not find a good angle for this.
9. How’s the fam?
Fam’s good. Thanks for showing you care. Some people clearly care about me and my well being, Bob.
10. How would you motivate me to get off my lazy arse?
I am trying to use a treadmill and Civ VI for myself. It is not going great because I have not made it into a habit yet.
11. Did I miss anything?
Well, if you were driving a cream colored sedan in Columbus, Ohio this morning around 8:27 a.m., you missed me.
12. What is your favorite Ohio day trip location?
When I was working for ODOT, I always enjoyed the days I had to drive up to the lakeshore, but I would not want to hang out there. Hocking Hills is always a nice trip for a day hike.
13. Related to your brush with death: what do you want as your epitaph?
Epitaph: "Is this far enough away, Bob?!?! #IWillHauntYourAss"
14. What do you want to have happen to your body when you die?
Cremated, ground into powder and added to the coffee at my memorial service. Fun fact: none of my family are coffee drinkers (except for my brother and sister in law. Andy, Michelle, don’t drink the coffee at my memorial service if you outlast me), so I would only be consumed by non-family members. You like coffee, don't you, Bob?
15. If you found yourself as a ghost, where would you haunt?
I love that you asked where and not who... because I think we all know the who. #NotTheBand
A Krispey Kreme Doughnuts because I could honestly watch that conveyor belt for all eternity.
16. Let’s say you’d rather live in a different country. Which country (or countries) would we pick and why.
I would easily pick Canada. A good bit of my wife’s work is in Canada and, I think, the transition would be the easiest. Where in Canada? That is a different question. I would let NS and BC fight over me. Honestly though, BC and NS would be fighting over my wife and kids. I would be included in the deal like door prize luggage.
Well, sometimes when a Labrador Retriever and a Poodle owner love each other very much they will force their respective dogs to conjugate so the offspring can be sold for dolla dolla bills, yo.
18. Why don’t you have a topic for us? Why are we your content machine? Why don’t you ask us the interesting topics? (Seems like you wanna talk about yourself a lot.) #iminterestingtoo
I usually have a topic in mind, but today I did not. As for why are you my content machine, well… Have you ever tried to ask yourself 20 questions, Bob? Have you? I have and it is not easy, buddy. I already know most of the answers prior to asking the question and the height of hubris would be to ask myself something I already know the answer to and then write down that answer because I thought other people would enjoy it sooo much. I do ask interesting topics, but if you would like to volunteer topics that you might find interesting, I would consider them. Considering your hashtag... You are interesting too, so starting tomorrow, get ready to answer 20 Questions, because you are next up for the interview. #HowDoYouLikeThemApples?
19. Who do you think you are, mr. funnyman? As if I don’t have hockey to watch and dishes to do. #screwthedishes#gothehelltobedkids #busythinkingofquestionsforlazyscott#puckdrop #periodtwo
I am not keeping you from washing dishes or watching your ice capades. This request for questions is and will always be purely voluntary.
20. Will you please go away now? Will you answer any of these? #probablynot #rhetoric #rantover #notyet#beerme #nowimdone
That’s 20. We out.
20 and donety
You don’t get a recap because Bob wanted me to go away
And some interesting shit could be in this recap, in fact there definitely was going to be #ThanksBob
Have a great weekend everyone