Of Restaurants, Sausage, and Politics.

I have been asked a few times by people who read this diatribe of mine, "Hey, where do you come up with this insightfully witty claptrap you call your blog?" Well, there is a saying about not wanting to know what happens in the kitchen of restaurants, how sausage is made, or how politicians get anything done. Well, you asked for it...

My mind is a vast wasteland of nothingness, well, at least that is how I would like to describe it. Then I could be a melancholy artist type. I would wear all black and talk about the merits of angst. “I would not be where I am today, had it not been for my angst…” Turns out, in all actuality, my mind is a jumbled up mess of useless factoids, swirling images of current life interspersed with ones from the past and maybe the future, thoughts about penguins and killer whales (such as how penguins and killer whales really do not apply to any formal color theory), obscure references, and endlessly looping annoying music.

(FYI: Right now the loop is something that I probably heard in the Barnes & Noble I worked at almost 8 years ago, and let me tell you, it is annoying. Sometimes it is bad MIDI arcade music, but that is only if I have to negotiate some sort of obstacle course. The Aimee Mann currently stuff running through my head is better than Elmo's World or the Doodlebops {it is Hell being a parent sometimes}. Damn.... I should not have mentioned the furry Muppet, now that is the song running through my head. At least it is not Mary Had a Little Lamb. Double Damn... Okay, now Winamp is open and I am listening to the dulcet tones of Zack De La Rocha and his happy go lucky band mates of Rage Against the Machine.)

Ah.... much better... Testify..... Anyway... There is too much going on inside the old noggin' to call it a Vast Wasteland of Nothingness. Now, I know some people would argue that ideas and memories really do not exist in any "real" capacity, well to them I say, "My mind is not a Vast Wasteland of Nothingness, it is a gooey mess of gray and white matter, a jumble of neural pathways dendrites, axons, etc..., but mainly it is gooey."

MP3's are great, Prodigy: Fire Starter

Anyway... operative words about the stuff between my ears are "jumbled" and "gooey," although the many levels and meanings of "icky" run a close third. Wow, I definitely seem batshit crazy today… Oh well, I guess I can live with that. Looking deep within the workings of my mind, I have discovered that I really do have a wealth of useless cartoon information. Like, I know an inordinate amount of information about the 80’s cartoon Bravestarr. Speed of the puma? SPEED OF THE PUMA?!?! WTF!!! Why the Hell do I remember anything about that cartoon? It was horrid. It was better than the craptastic cartoon, The Silverhawks, that followed it on TV every afternoon at 4:30, I mean WTH was up with that Bluegrass character?

Now you have seen into my mind, and I am sure you are the worse for it.