High Schoolies

There is no Hell like High Schooly Prom night dining. Sweet Mother of God and all that is Holy! High Schoolers are quite the annoying demographic. Let me set the stage for you.

It is Saturday evening, May 6th, 2006. A breezy night that is just a little bit on the cool side. It is not cold by any means, but it is definitely straying into cool territory when the wind picks up. It is the night before Wifey’s birthday and we are going out for a fun and yet satisfying dinner at Fujiyama Japanese Steakhouse. Yes, yes, we are well away of the hokeyness factor associated with a hibachi steak house. Yes, we are very aware that going to Fujiyama is not the paragon of societal class, but we are also aware that we enjoy the experience for what it is: American gluttony within the confines of an ethnic restaurant. It is much like a Chinese buffet, just more pricy. The food there is pretty in-authentic and over Americanized, and there are just insane amounts of it to shove in our gleeful faces.

Anyway… earlier that day we attempted to get reservations there. They could not seat us until 8 pm. We were a bit confused by this, since typically we can get a reservation for typical dinner time the day of said dinner event without any trouble at all. As we drove up to the restaurant, we realized why it was so difficult to get a reservation.

Prom... Frikkin’... Night

Yes, that is correct. It was prom night. Oh Good Lord, It was prom night. There were about 40 high school kids strewn about the restaurant, in all there high school finery. I realized something Saturday night. I think the reason I hated high school was that I hate high schoolies. They are not that bright. In fact they are the opposite of bright. They are all loudly-look-at-me dull. As we drove up we saw the typical this-is-my-first-limo-ride-and-I-am-in-high-school-standing-up-in-the-sunroof high schoolie. Point of note for said high schoolie: It is the same as the time you stood up in your friend’s sunroof, this car is just longer. Anyway… he had both arms raised and was shouting woo-hoo while the limo driver rolled his eyes and slumped a bit more at the despair in his life. **I am sure he thought to himself, “I’ll become a limo driver. I can meet celebrities when they come into town, I can drive newly married couples to the airport, I will be the happiest person on the face of the earth.” Sadly this poor man gets saddled with 16 year olds who most likely treat him like yesterday’s shit.**

Luckily we were at a table without any of the High Schoolies, but we were directly across from them. It was painful to watch the interactions of them. Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah captain of the football team blah blah blah blah blah blah blah he’s cute blah blah blah blah blah blah blah that teacher sucks blah blah blah blah blah look at me blah blah blah blah no, look at me, blah blah blah blah blah blah blah. Just plain painful. Luckily the food was good, and we left all full and happy. We went where we knew no high schoolies would be, an Organic Grocery Store.

To recap:
Saturday Night was prom night
Yet another prom I did not go to
Tip to the kid across the table: Stop using the walkie talkie function on your phone to talk to your friend 2 tables away. Your date is getting pissed
Not to mention it is annoying the horse piss out of me
What are they feeding the girls these days?
They were all well endowed and tall
High school girls were not built like that when I was in high school
Not that it would have mattered
I was not really popular in high school
Go figure
I got Wifey some new pants for the birthday