20 Question Tuesday: 12: Breakfast Cereal

It is Tuesday again, which means that it is again time for 20 Questions Tuesday. Today’s topic revolves around breakfast cereals. Why breakfast cereals you might ask? Well, because last week’s topic caused many a convulsion and fainting spell. What can I say? High school was a difficult time for some of us. Anyway, thanks for the questions everyone. This week’s questioneers are God Almighty (hey, that is how he wanted to be referred), ACW, Lsig, and Popo. Here come the questions.

1. What was the significant difference between Cap'n Crunch, Quisp, Quake, and Freakies?
I believe the main differences between these 4 cereals are shape and the icon. Cap’n Crunch features a caucasoidal 18th century naval officer and the cereal was shaped like little barrels. Quisp features a pink alien with a propeller on his head who was wearing a green jumpsuit. The cereal was shaped like a saucer. Quake was a burly miner who seemed to be tinged purple. His cereal was in the shape of gears and gogs. These 3 cereals were/are all produced by Quaker Oats with the same exact recipe. The last cereal in question, The Freakies, is produced by Ralston. This cereal featured 7 Freakies (much like the mythological Furies except they were merely freaky): Hamhose, Gargle, Cowmumble, Grumble, Goody-Goody, Snorkeldorf and the leader BossMoss. The Freakies resided in the tree that grew Freakies cereal. I am unsure of the shape of the cereal though.

2. Knowing how big brothers operate, what else would they have convinced Mikey to try putting into his mouth?
I am sure that the bowl of Life Cereal they conned Mikey into eating was the last one he ever got. The older brothers were not into getting Mikey to eat things he would actually like. I am sure goldfish, batteries, and lastly motor oil were on his menu.

3. If you were to go coo-coo for Cocoa Puffs, what manic state would you enter for Fruity Pebbles?
Good Question. Hmmmm… If it weren’t copywrited, I would say “Freaky,” but one can only go “Freaky for Freakies” now. After consulting good old Roget’s I would say that I would be fervent for Fruity Pebbles or possibly frenzied.

4. Why are there no female breakfast cereal icon (syrups don't count)?
I think the whole concept of cereal is too barbarically easy for a female icon. One simple pours out the cereal and then pours the milk. It is too simple a preparation to waste on a female. Female icons need to be horrid racial stereotypes to make us feel like our pancake mix was prepared by our very own slave labor, or they need to focus on some antiquated view of how women are supposed to behave when they become grandmothers. Pancakes should smell like freshly mixed oppression smothered with grandmotherly love.

5. In a fair fight: Cookie Burglar or the Trix rabbit?
There is no fair fight where the Cookie Burglar is concerned. That guy is just a bastard. So my initial reaction is to go with the hardened criminal and not the bunny, but…. If the fight is over Trix cereal, the Burglar is going down.

6. Did the cereal companies really think we would be fooled by changing the names of their cereals to remove words like "sugar?"
Did KFC think we would forget the F stood for Fried? Do Bears poop in the woods? Is the Pope Catholic? Is this a rhetorical question?

7. What happened to all the cool toys? Now they're just CD-ROMs. WTF?
There never really were cool toys. Now there are crappy games instead of crappy toys. Thank you digital revolution.

8. What ever happened to "Mikey?"
See Question 2: Drank motor oil. The Benzene content did not agree with him and he was no more.

9. Haven't the authorities captured the Trix Rabbit yet? He's plainly breaking the law.
The Trix rabbit is only attempting to break the law. The Trix rabbit never actually breaks the law.

10. What was your favorite part about eating cereal? Was it the cereal or the flavored milk afterwards
I can honestly say it was the cereal. I did drink the milk afterward, but the best part has and will always be the cereal.

11. Are you among the many who tried putting chocolate milk on regular Life cereal to approximate the taste of "brown" (i.e. cinnamon) Life and regular milk?

12. Grape Nuts contain neither grapes nor nuts. Can you explain this?
I have never understood this cereal. It is basically like eating gravel in milk. The cereal has no real association with grapes and it is not even nutty. I don’t get it. My dad loved this cereal, but I never understood why.

13. In a fight to the death, who wins- Count Chocula or Frankenberry? Is Boo Berry even a factor?
Count Chocula and Frankenberry are already dead. One does not win a fight to the death when both combatants are undead.

14. Is being a face on the Wheaties box still on the radar of the modern athlete?
Not even remotely. Heck, I am not even sure if they are still plastering atheletes on the box anymore.

15. What is your favorite type of cereal to eat by the handful sans milk?
Cracklin’ Oat Bran

16. What makes Lucky Charms sooo magically delicious??
Crack. Crack is not actually whack, it is magically delicious.

17. Why do Honey Smacks use a frog as its mascot?
What, you don’t see the direct correlation between frogs and honey? Frogs eat bees, duh!

18. Life vs. Cinnamon Life, which one is better?
Life, because it is already lightly cinnamoned anyway.

19. What part of daily allowance of vitamins and minerals are marshmallows???
The small part.

20. Drink or don't drink the leftover milk in the bowl?
Drink it. Most definitely drink it.

To Recap:
Both Little Man and Wifey are doing better today
Ther are both still ill, but they are better
Not sure what is for dinner tonight
With 2 of the 3 of us being ill, cooking doesn't seem so worth it
I need to go make lunch
I am hungry
I only had potato chips for dinner last night
And they were stale
Hopefully tales of wellness will be talked about tomorrow