20 Questions Tuesday: 96 - Get back to work, you

So, I am now back at work. Let me tell you something: After 2 and a half weeks of basking in the glow of love that is my family, going back to work sucks. I am tired and cranky. Oh, and I don’t like people. So today’s 20 Questions will be about that process of going back to work.

Thanks this week to Dustin, Belsum, Dr B Dawg, and Sparky. On to the questions

1. On a scale of 1 – 10: How hard was it to get out of bed this morning (assuming you made it to bed in the first place).
π... mmmmmmm pie

2. What does one pack for lunch on their triumphant “RETURN TO WORK DAY!”
One goes out to lunch

3. How many new pictures of your little bundle of joy do you have to add to your desk?
I am a modern man. I have many a picture on a thumb drive

4. Estimated number of gallons of coffee you’ll need to consume to make it through the week?
Zero. What don’t you people get? I don’t drink coffee. The taste never lives up to the aroma.

5. Did anyone steal your stapler while you were gone?
Nope. I still have my 2 staplers and 4 pairs of scissors

6. What percentage of your 239 emails can you just delete or move to another folder and call it good enough?
10 were honest to goodness work related, so that works out to just over 4%.

7. Is it easier to come back after a short absence or a long one?
I would imagine a shorter break would have made it somewhat easier. Also spending the time with family that I don't like would have made the return easier as well.

8. Do your co-workers expect you to be fully engaged right away or do you get an unofficial grace period for your brain to adjust?
There was an un-official grace period. Yesterday was pretty much a wash between clearing my email inbox and conversing with everyone about baby stuff.

9. Are standard office supplies as a group (wooden pencils, pens, notepads, printer paper) in the top five for most environmentally wasteful things around?

I don’t think so. I think fast food packaging is up there and pizza boxes. Most recycling centers cannot use pizza boxes.

10. Did you arrive at work with a picture of the new one?

I have her hospital picture in my wallet and 24 other images on a thumb drive.

11. Future stay at home dad?

I wouldn’t be able to handle it. I need non-kid centered conversation.

12. Do you have a workday avatar?

13. So far today, what's been the most frequently asked question?
“So, you gonna have any more?” I swear to God, if I could stab some people in the eye...

14. How much Mountain Dew did it take before you could form a complete sentence this a.m.?
A good 20oz. A better question would have been “How much Mountain Dew did it take before you could form a coherent sentence this a.m.?”

15. How do you think mommies cowgirl up for returning to work after a 3-month maternity leave? Let's not forget that during their absence they, oh I don't know, gave birth to a child and have been getting zero sleep!
I have no idea how they do it… simply no idea.

16. If you were a full-time, stay at home dad for 5 years and had to return to the workplace, what job title and description would you give those 5 years on your resume?
Freelance team manager

17. Do you think professional athletes dread going "back to work" once their off-season is over? I mean really, "Oh man, I have to golf today...and get paid for it!"
You sound bitter. Don't hate the player, hate the game.

18. Was there a party waiting for you at work?
No :-( and my birthday was this weekend too. Nothing, nada, zip, zilch. I had to buy my own lunch and everything.

19. Have you even done any work since you came back in?
A little.

20. There is no Question 20
Oh, thank goodness. I couldn’t bear to answer another question about coming back to work.

To recap:
I need to bring my iPod docking station back into work
Played a bit with SketchUp today
It is an interesting program
So far all I have been able to do is modify other people’s models
Soon I shall bring about models of my own
Then all shall fear me
Umm…. Where was I?
I need to take some time and get some Copic Markers
Maybe that is a trip I can make at lunch tomorrow
Listening to people working all around me
The near rhythmic clicks of mouses mice meese clicky thingers and the tappa tappa tappa of keyboards
Lulling… me…