So, I went to the dentist today. It was time for my 6 month check-up. The appointments only come around twice a year, so I really don’t feel like I can be a “no-show.” I am not sure where my over-inflated sense of responsibility regarding dental professionals’ time arises from, but, clearly, it seems that I have some issues there. Not so with cable guys. I would make them wait for me if it weren’t in their power to leave and say I wasn’t there.

Anyway… I had my semi-annual dental appraisal and cleaning today. Turns out my teeth would be worth more if they were either whiter or were petrified sharks teeth. Anyway… the hygienist (her name I think was “Peppy”) mentioned that I had Tartar on 1or 2 of my teeth, and proceeded to tell me about her vacation last week whilst scraping and poking around in my mouth. It was really pleasant. I was not aware that Peppy’s mother did not like pancakes prior to this trip to the dentist, but as it turns out… Anyway… everything was going along swimmingly. Peppy was done with my cleaning and went to get the sign off by the Dentist.

Get this, my dentist wants me to floss more. What is up with that?!?! I almost politely explained that since I have a dental hygienist clean my teeth every 6 months, I felt that flossing was one of the time consuming things that might be able to be dropped while Little Man’s breathing was for shit. I nearly continued to explain that giving breathing treatments every 4 hours to a 3.6 year old doesn’t really leave that much quality time for me and my teeth. Then I would have continued by mentioning to her that while I was not able to do as much flossing as she would have liked (I think the acceptable amount of flossing for dentists is 2 hours a day of careful and methodical flossing with gilded silk ribbons), I was still able to keep cavities from forming and even not have any gingivitis going on. But before I could launch into my tirade against her dental advice, I remembered that she had tooth drills, and prudently decided to keep my mouth shut.

To recap:
I can’t believe it is only Thursday
It feels like Baldenday to me
You know the day after Emdleday
The 11 th day of the week
You know…
Man, it seems like this has been looooooong week
And it is only Thursday
I could floss every hour on the hour and my dentist would recommend that I floss more
Isn't it their job to clean my teeth anyway?
Road crews don't ask me to fill in potholes for them
I should have eaten a doughnut right before getting my teeth cleaned out if spite
Instead I ate a doughnut right before getting my teeth cleaned out of hunger
I think they should be glad it was not a broccoli filled doughnut
I think I should be happy it was not a broccoli filled doughnut
Instead of being “eaten” it would still be a neglected doughnut on a table that no one would eat
Like a Boston Cream doughnut
Those are horrible
Vanilla Cream FTW! Baby!
I could go on for days about doughnuts
‘Cause I love me some doughnuts
But I won’t
Have a great weekend everyone